Ripped from Reddit via u/cherrimsunshine – I am not the OP
I’m asking for perspective because I’m curious what other people’s experiences are in this.
My partner of 5 years basically doesn’t know anything about how menstruation works or birth control for that matter. He basically just knows I get my period at the same time every month and sometimes it’s rough. When we first started dating I let him know I was on birth control and he got offended because he didn’t realize that I, like many others, used it for acne / hormone control. He thought I was just hooking up with a bunch of guys I guess. Which either way, not a good reaction, but his ignorance was shocking to me.
On the other hand, around the time I got my first period, my dad actually taught me how menstruation works. My mom said he knew more than she did actually. He knew all about the cycles and ovulation, etc. I didn’t realize how rare it was for a man to know this at the time.
Anyways I just had to explain to my boyfriend something about how birth control works and wondered if anyone has a partner (I’m saying male partner because women are more likely to have an understanding) that has made an effort to understand how menstruation and / or birth control works. It’s like every time I bring up something about my period or my birth control he’s learning something for the first time. I guess it’d just be nice if he cared to learn since it is a big part of my life and we’ve been together for 5 years now. I kind of envy people whose partners keep up with their cycle. My boyfriend doesn’t care to know because it doesn’t immediately affect him but considering we both definitely don’t want kids, you would think he’d care to at least understand the processes that keep my womb child-free?
Also just for laughs, one time I told my boyfriend I had an appointment with my ob-gyn and he asked me why men don’t have special doctors for their dicks. I was like uhh…because we…have full reproductive systems in our bodies…? Lmfao.
TLDR: My boyfriend doesn’t know anything about menstruation or birth control. Do your partners know / care to learn about the processes?
I talk about my cycle so much that any men I’m with are going to learn eventually. I even make my guy friends hear about it.
I’m sure this varies with age, and some younger men may be more immature or resistant at first and I wouldn’t consider it a huge red flag unless they were stubborn about it. But I would keep an eye out for other symptoms of toxic masculinity/misogyny at play and start a conversation.
But I’m in my 30s now and if a man is in their 30s and can’t follow conversations about menstruation, that’s a no-go for me. It would reveal a willful ignorance that I wouldn’t be able to abide.
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Haha I totally agree. If you’re 30+ and you still get freaked out about a woman’s cycle, you’re probably not my type of person to be hanging out with. I work with all dudes, literally the only girl in the field across 3 locations, they all get to hear about it when I feel like I’m dying. Thankfully nobody gets weird about it.