Hi, I’m 21/male from Germany and to me it seems like people here are constantly negative and complaining compared to people from other/non-Western countries who seem way more chill.
I assume this is probably the worst here in Germany since this is also a stereotype about Germans that they constantly complain about things and in my opinion this is very true from experiencing real life here every day. But I would say I’ve also noticed this from other western countries, maybe not as extreme but for example in America people also seem to be pretty hateful and seem to make a drama out of everything (at least from what I can tell on the internet).
I just wonder why these people unnecessarily spread this negativity because in my opinion here in these western 1st world countries we have so much luxury compared to other places. For example other countries have wars, people live in terror and extreme injustice/corruption, people starve to death, get abused, raped and tortured and need to seek refuge in other countries. But we complain that eggs are too expensive and that we have too many migrants, which goes so far that America is deporting all illegal migrants including those who might’ve fled from the things mentioned earlier such as violence and rape.
Why do people waste all this time with complaining and being negative if they could use this time to be grateful, enjoy life and make the world a better place? To me this seems like people are destroying their own life and make it unnecessarily harder/unhappy with that behavior. I think I’m noticing this particularly in older people including my parents. It almost feels like they’re unable to be positive and only know how to complain.
You complain about what you experience whether it’s genocide or losing a shoe. Humans everywhere complain. It’s not unique to the West.
People from non-Western countries complain too; it’s just that in a dictatorship complaining can get you thrown in prison or worse so people take care not to complain too much in public.
Also non-Westerners are online too, but perhaps we aren’t aware of what’s being said because it’s not in English.
I think people just became accustomed to bitching on the internet because you can distance yourselves and say whatever. Some of us have become addicted to bitching, even IRL.
That might be true. Maybe it’s a global trend?
Because the internet is majority English speaking, giving us a louder voice to shout with, also the profit incentives of social media and “news” outlets have them running the most outraging stories that will sell adverts and attention
What do you mean English speaking? Not all Western countries speak English. For example here in Germany we speak German and people constantly complain in German
You’re speaking English right now
Oh yea my bad I think I now understand what you mean. Online the majority is definitely English but I think if you look into each country locally like Germany you will see that they also constantly complain irl in German and not just online. That’s what I meant
mass media manipulation propaganda works by getting you to take the messaging from the magic box irl
For the majority of the last century, life has been pretty great for Americans, essentially putting them on top of the world. Generations have seen nothing but life improving for their children and grandchildren, with no indication of it slowing down. For most of this time, many people haven’t even needed to really sacrifice much for it the way that previous generations have.
This is finally starting to change.
Decades ago, we were told we’d finally have to start sacrificing to make a better life for our children. That didn’t sit well with some people.
Millions of people are coming to the West (not just the US) for a better life, and have been for generations. While we’re getting more tax dollars, resources are being spread more thin.
As well, it’s been harder for people to earn a living. Before some time in the 1970s, company earnings were tightly coupled with employee earnings. Since then, company productivity and earnings have skyrocketed, while inflation-adjusted employee earnings have stagnated. Of course, employee productivity continues to skyrocket with advances in technology.
Nowadays, the “current” generation is feeling the pain.
Before, a person could graduate high school and find a good job to be able to afford a house, a car, and a family. Sometimes their spouse needed to work, too.
Nowadays, two people working in a household often can’t afford to own a home. Yet the companies they’re working for are making more money than ever.
Long story short, the US has been on top of the world for decades, and for the last half a century, they’ve been funneling their wealth upwards while taking away from the working class. There was so much money to go around that it wasn’t enough to notice for generations. But now, people aren’t just noticing – they’re feeling it.
And there doesn’t seem to be any agreement on what needs to be done to make it better. (Partially because it’s cheaper to fund media-based distractions than to fund social programs that would help people, or to tax corporations and the rich!)
- When you’re chasing your next meal, you don’t have time to complain. Western society enables us to shift our priorities to higher levels on Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.
- Feelings project differently in different cultures. For example, Spanish speaking people often align depression with physical exhaustion.
- You many not know the people well enough to know their most intimate thoughts and intentions. Complaining in autocratic societies could be considered dissent and get you killed.
- Similar to 3, they may be treating you as a D-list celebrity or a tourist because they have something to gain from doing so. Refer to point 1.
- Consider the audience. Who are the kind of people who have frequent access to Internet in these countries and would want to talk to Western citizens?
I have the same observation. My guess: people aren’t made for hapiness, but for the pursuit of hapiness. Quality of life has not been improving for most in EU, au contraire.
Negativity bias has been an evolutionary advantage for hundreds of thousands of years of our development. You don’t exactly “breed out” a trait that has been honed to such a degree in a generation or two.
I feel quality of life has improved massively in EU. Everything is the best it has ever been in my region.
In the past few years options to get things delivered to my home tripled. Crime rate is way down. Even though I’m not a vegan, I have many good vegan options I often choose now (like various vegan chocolate from all supermarkets near me). Public transport is super cheap at the moment. More than 90% of my company works from home. A lot of things have been automated or work online, e.g. payroll, most bills, banking, some administrative things, getting doctors appointments, etc…
I agree with this take.
We are wired to find the next problem and to solve it. Enjoy our work for a short while and then start looking for the next problem to solve.
Whether it is cultural or genetic, I don’t know, but it’s definitely very deep in our western psyche and it will not be going away any time soon.
The main problem I see is that a lot of people in Western society nowadays use complaining as a substitute for action, and so problems don’t get solved, but people convince themselves that they took action by complaining.
I think this is a classic case of “The complainers are way more vocal than the life enjoyers”, combined with modern technology being set up to promote controversial content. When someone’s enjoying this life and being chill, they also don’t usually care about spreading thier message. The complainers are either memetic or often political and seem to enjoy a much greater platform. Also more controversial content generates more negative engagement, and most social media promotes content that has high engagement, because it benefits them to have users engage and stay on the site longer.
That’s true. But I definitely also encounter loads of complaining irl and rarely see people being positive. At least here in northern Germany there are so many people that seem to constantly focus on the negative and search for things they can complain about. It’s almost like their every day habit. Instead of going outside and pointing out something positive they just always have stuff to criticize
Hey, I know what you mean. I catch myself doing this too, just looking for things to nitpick about. A nasty habit. My friend sometimes reminds me ‘you’re doing that thing again’ which is helpful. The thing is it doesn’t even feel like negativity -to me I’m just making conversation. I have to be more considerate when in the company of others and just enjoy experiences for what they are.
Hmm, that could be an attempt at bonding over a common enemy? Kind of like talk bad about the boss behind his back, so that you bond woth your peers? Generally not for everyone, but could see how people get fixated on it if it works for them. Or maybe they are just caught up in the negative media and it has a big effect on their overall mood. Do the happier countries you mentioned have less reliance on media? Again, negative generates views, thats why the news is usually mostly bad.
I think it’s part of human nature to try to improve things. If we just said “be happy with what you have” we wouldn’t have the very nice things we enjoy today.
But at the same time people are wary of change, and if something works well it is a risk to try to improve things. Older people have been around a long time, so nostalgia and routine is more engrained so they’ll be more critical of change even if it works out in the long run.
But no matter how good it gets people can ALWAYS find something to bitch about and some are just insufferable
Yea I’m not too worried about constructive criticism of things that can really matter to a certain extend. But I’m experiencing many people in life who constantly complain about the smallest things. No matter if in grocery stores the workers are complaining if someone asks them where a specific item is or people in every day life always focusing on something negative and pointing out what they don’t like
This has the same energy as boomers secure in their owned homes saying younger people struggling to afford rent are ungrateful complainers who should work harder. “I’m not experiencing it, so it must not exist!”
Lift others up.
Exactly! But they keep complaining even though they don’t know what the real struggle is like
Well, people in general seem to be more vocal when something isn’t going right compared to when everything is perfect and amazing.
Let’s also remember that the internet is not entirely reflective of real life, that people exaggerate, and that we only have the perspective of the person speaking/writing at a specific point in time.
Do the people complaining in those countries have more free speech and involvement in politics than the people from other countries?
Social media gets more engagement (and therefore more ad money) from people who are upset, so it intentionally shows you stuff that’s bad/stuff to complain about.
Also, it’s important to complain about stuff. Not too much, but definitely some. If people never complained about 16 hour workdays in poor working conditions, we’d still be doing that.
I don’t mean just social media. I’m particularly focusing on actual life here in Germany. They don’t just complain about bigger things like work but seem to be dissatisfied with every littlest thing
expectations. We expect being able to own a home and be secure in our lifestyle right through retirement till death and that is not a thing anymore. If I was secure in my home and that I could get healthcare and eat somewhat healthy I would not complain much at all. Although the whole privacy and rights being torn apart would also be complained but im in the us.
That’s not what I mean by complaining. I mean people complaining about the smallest thing like if they criticize someone in public wearing an outfit they don’t like
oh. sorry can’t help with you there. I stay away from those people.
You gotta watch that short YouTube about a book called “cultural map”.
It’s gauging various cultures and how they handle different aspects of society. It doesn’t cover openly talking about positivity or negativity since it’s focused on business. But the framework is all the same.
For example it put in words things that everyone knows, like Frenchmen are confrontational, Japanese are very hierarchical. Then it goes into plot twist territory.
Because there’s a lot of shit to complain about, and it feels like things are getting steadily worse. Especially today when I’m watching the rise of fascism in real time, when I’m watching friends and family be persecuted by a push to make bigotry into law, and when it all feels like there’s nothing I can do about any of this because I’m just some guy.
Yes, I know that children are starving in Africa. No, pointing that out does not make me feel better.
That’s not what I mean. I mean complaining about these small every day things like the weather, foreigners and so forth even though there are way worse things in life.